Thanksgiving discovered.

This time of year, it is quite natural for us to say and hear multitudes of gratitude laced sentiments.  Lists of things, people, experiences, miracles, circumstances, relationships, opportunities that we’re all so very grateful for.  This Thanksgiving season and particularly on the 4^th Thursday of November, Facebook is filled with them.  Dinner tables everywhere make time for sharing them.  Strangers seem more generous with smiles.  There is a palpable warmth in the chilly Autumn air. 

This of course, is good.  But it got me wondering.  What is gratitude, really?  Beyond a momentary sentiment that we surely feel deep in our bones.  Beyond a seasonal fleeting day where we gather and stuff our “hungry” (glutenous) faces with Grammy’s famous cranberry sauce.  Beyond the natural excitement in our hearts that the the holidays are now just around the corner.  Surely this feeling- this sentiment that fuels heartfelt energy to keep family traditions alive, that keeps our nation shutting down for a day to commemorate it-this feeling of gratitude, “Thanksgiving” must intimate something much more than a momentary feeling of self-focused gratefulness.  What I thought, was the original intent?  Further, have we done well by this tradition, or have we missed the mark of its intent?

As I thought on this, I decided to research the origins of the actual Thanksgiving holiday.   

I reached deep into my memories of my Kindergarten Pilgrim costumes (I always chose to dress up as the Pilgrim because it was easier to make-but the Indian costumes were always way better-colorful and fun), and took my questions to google.  

I was surprised to discover the ORIGINAL Pilgrim concept of Thanksgiving had nothing to do with the feasts that we focus our attentions to now.  Rather, the tradition of expressing thanks to the Lord are recorded as a full day of prayer and FASTING (huh?) to show gratitude for the mercies and provisions given to a struggling colony.   That’s right-FASTING.  Like, the opposite of feasting.  Now-I’m in no way suggesting we revert to this.  I personally have a huge bowl of mashed potatoes waiting on me tomorrow-I can hear them calling to me already.  But it is an interesting twist.  The biblical intention for the act of fasting is essentially giving up food (or something else) for a period of time in order to focus your thoughts on God. While fasting, many people read the Bible, pray, or worship. Fasting is found throughout the Old and New Testaments of the Bible, over fifty times!  The outcome of course, it to develop a disciplined attitude of submission and ultimately, GRATITUDE. 

But-the bible also uses beautiful descriptions and lots of examples of bountiful feasts to celebrate both special moments and of course our gratitude.  And, as my god-daughter Noelle always reminded us with her sweet little smile “It’s never a party without a cake”.  So, the natural course of our nation’s history is easy to understand-the celebration of Thanksgiving is followed by FEASTS! 

Since childhood we’ve all been taught the story of the first time Pilgrims and Indians came together over a harvest feast. The fact that we’ve added our Disney feel good ending to much of their story seems irrelevant at this point.  It would be some 100 plus years after the original celebrations (both in prayer and in feast) before the first state proclaimed a day of thanks, and yet another 100 for the government to follow suit (Thanks Abe Lincoln!).  Of course, we wouldn’t be a country if we didn’t experience presidential power plays in the years to come over what date should be “THE” date and whether or not the government even had the right to proclaim such a holiday…blah blah (some things never change) …and poof here we are!  We get the 4^th Thursday of every November to, as Abraham Lincoln put it, "render thanks to our Heavenly Father for these inestimable blessings".

The point is that people-friends, communities and unlikely companions set aside everything else in life to organize feasts with the expressed intent to celebrate, in gratitude, bountiful harvests and safe passage into another year.   

This of course, is good.  But again…the question remained-besides a day of thanks, there must be something more?  But in a culture where we all get to have “our truth” and nobody gets to tell anyone what they should believe or what they should do” …what can we UNIFY around as the call to action as a result of this national day of thanks?  What is our cultural North Star as a result of this day of thanks?  What is the universal answer to “We have this, now we should go go and do this” question around the purpose of Thanksgiving? 

And then it hit me-Like decoding a secret in a famous Dan Brown novel, the answer lies not just in the history, not just in the feeling, but it quite obviously lies in the very word itself.  ThanksGIVING.    

Can we not agree, regardless of spiritual or cultural differences, that the PURPOSE of this day is to allow oneself to reflect and celebrate being so profoundly grateful that it creates and propels forward an attitude of GIVING.  Period.  Stop there just for a minute.  The grateful “for what” and giving “how and to whom” of course are different for each of us, but the feeling and the purpose of that feeling are SHARED by us all.  Or at least that is the idea behind all of this.  Isn’t it?

You see in the end, I realized, for this to work, we CANNOT stop at “being thankful”.  That’s only half the story.  We must ALLOW this feeling, this belief, this sentiment that we experience to our bones propel us outward, outside of ourselves to EXPRESS that gratitude in an attitude and action of giving to others. Generously. 

Some may feel led to give well beyond what makes them comfortable:  of their time, resources and treasures.  For others, God may simply lead you to give kindness, comfort and a warm smile to one who desperately needs it: a friend, family, strangers…or even to a foe.  Regardless of who, how and how much....the point is to GIVE.

I pray this year for an open mind and a willing heart.  To be keenly aware of opportunities to take the gratitude I feel for so much, submit it and generously give it outward to the people the Good Lord puts in front of me. 

Happy Thanksgiving my friends.  May your potatoes be buttery, and your turkey be juicy.  You are all so valuable.  You are all so worthy.

Darcy

grat·i·tude

/ˈɡradəˌt(y)o͞od/Submit

noun

the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.

Wear your faith!

If you follow my boutique then lately you’ve seen me share more of what I call my “Wear your faith” collection.  I felt it important to clarify “why”.

To some, it may simply seem that I own a boutique. I sell women’s clothing and accessories.

Sure, that’s true.  But the context of “why” runs much deeper.  I won’t bore you with the details of the struggles of my life.  It would be dishonest of me to say “I’m grateful for them all”.  I have definitely learned through them all, but they’ve also each taken a bit of a toll in different ways.  Finding myself in early menopause and soon facing an empty nest situation, some of the big questions of life started to resurface for me.

There is much in my life I am proud of and humbly grateful for:  My children, my husband, my family, my friends, my faith, my career.  The list is quite long.  So why was I struggling so much to find acceptance in who I was?  In who I am?

I think the truth is that we live in a society filled with images of fantasy and perfection.  Materialism and vanity and air-brushed images of bodies, of life.  But that wasn’t me.  I didn’t fit into that.  My body was aging.  I no longer looked or even felt my youthful vibrance.  I hadn’t “made it” as far as I thought I would in my career at this point.  I wondered...does that mean it’s “over”?  Is it “too late” for anything great?

The answer to that question can be found by reading below, and also by watching “Under the Tuscan Sun”-one of my all time favorite movies.  A-hem, I digress.  NO! No, It was not over.  Far from it!  I looked around and saw many other women just like me.  Women I admired.  Women who had “been through it” in life-and were more beautiful, stronger, wiser, better now than they EVER were before.  And THAT is the woman I want to celebrate.  THAT is the image I want to promote.  THAT is the culture I want to breed.  THAT is the example I want to set.  That is why I want to wear MY faith and encourage others to wear theirs!

So my boutique caters to these women.  Women who understand this concept....well,  I call them my “Blissed Out Babes”.

WHO is a Blissed Out Babe?

A Blissed Out Babe is a women with EXPERIENCE in the ways of life.  One who doesn’t give up, at least not for long, striving  everyday to become more of who she was made to be.  She knows life is a journey to be experienced, not a race to be won.  Every line on her face has a story to tell, a lesson to be learned.  She is magnificently BEAUTIFUL.

She’s loved lavishly.  She’s mourned grievously.
She’s won big.  She’s lost huge.
She’s given the best of her heart and her mind.  Some have given back, many have only taken.
She’s known the peace of having plenty.  She’s known the hardship of not having enough.
She’s searched far and wide for meaning and value.  She’s found it at times.  She’s felt lost many times.
She’s had BEST friends.  She’s dealt with enemies.
She’s had children.  She’s lost children.
She’s had great loves.  She’s lost great loves.
She’s forgiven.  She’s been forgiven.
She’s decided at times NOT to forgive. She’s experienced not being forgiven.
She’s been a warrior and victor.  She’s been defeated and lost her sense of purpose and drive.
She’s beautiful, but she’s felt ugly.
She’s tall.  She’s short.
She’s skinny.  She’s fluffy.
She’s satisfied.  She’s dissatisfied.
She’s loud.  She’s quiet.
She’s funny.  She’s smart.
She’s graceful. She’s fierce.
She’s youthful.  She’s aging.
She feels happy.  She’s depressed.
She is peaceful.  She’s anxious.
She speaks with the breath of God.  She shouts her emotions.

She is a daughter of God. Her value is worth more than rubies. She is magnificent. She is loved. She is you.

#joinus #blissedandblessed #sharethelove #bewhoyouare #celebratewomen

Airport tight-rope walking

This girl I know.  She’s staring at the tight-wire, 20 stories up.  He whispers “Do you trust me”?  To trust Him means she takes the scariest step she’s ever taken.  One to which every rational thought in her brain screams “No!”  But she’s standing there….with a choice to make.  Taking that step means holding onto NOTHING but the invisible force in front of her calling her forward.  Or…she stays put.  Stays put, turns around and walks back to the same old place. The comfortable place.  The safe place. The sad place if she’s being honest with herself.   After all, that’s why she’s standing in front of the tight-wire anyway….she walked toward it in pursuit of something greater, something wilder, something less safe.

Have you been there?  I mean really been there?

She wonders if she’s alone in this struggle, this significant decision. Not the “Bacon burger  vs. the Vegan bean burger” decision.  Rather the monumental choice to make the leap. The scary choice with the uncertain outcome.

She sits in the airport after another day of fulfilling her corporate duty.  The one she’d been groomed to do for decades.  The path that promised security and safety. Or did it?   I mean deep down she knew that she was no more secure than the last 20 poor schmucks that were escorted into an early retirement.  But she’s there…because it’s it feels 100O X safer than anything “out there”.  Another girl sits next to her.  She’s in an abusive relationship, hiding her scars and her reality from the world.  Deep down she knows she’s no less at risk than the last 20 poor women who lost their very lives to fury and rage at the hand of their betrothed. But she’s there….because it feels 1000 X more familiar than anything “out there”.  Beside her sits yet a girl waiting to fly back to her dorm room.  She’s paralyzed by her anxiety, hiding from her family and her world around her, the one nobody understands.  Deep down she knows she’s no less safe from losing her battle to the bottle of pills that dull her pain.  But she stays there with them because she feels 1000 X more a sense of belonging than anything or anyone “out there”.

But…her heart.  She yearns for something wilder, something free.  An unpaved path, untouched wilderness.  Where anything she creates is her-her gift, her mark. Her legacy.  Her.  She’s defined herself  as the opposite for so long:  Someone confined by rule following and people pleasing. The one who tows the expected line, even when she knows there is a better way. Someone who doesn’t ruffle feathers.  Someone who everyone can depend on, who carries the weight and smiles through her tears.  Trapped in a functional body while her sanguine creativity, the beauty of her very essence, withers.

She sits, in another airport, looking for ways to pass another hour.  Then it came-that unexpected and poignant message from God through one of His messengers who has no idea she is even being used by “Him”.  That girl, the messenger, probably just thinks it’s just a random circumstance that placed her in front of this long lost friend, so she’s says the first thing that’s on her mind.  Little does she know that she’s actually one of many that God has used to nurture His leading in this girl’s life….the leading to a new place, a different place, a place that makes no material promise, but rather a promise of adventure and provisional security in the unseen and unknown.  In Him.  The message-it was just so…on point.  Standing there in the airport, she recognized instantly it was in fact part of  “the call”…not from her friend, but from “Him”.  She loves the feeling His call produces.  It’s better than every call of every lover she’s ever had combined.  HIS call, is the most attractive, the most exciting yet the most mysterious and the most alluring.

She’s heard His call before.  Sometimes loud-sometimes not. She hears it most notably when she allows herself time and space to hear anything other than the distracting sounds of the world spinning around her.  To hear His soft, peaceful, beautiful voice requires her to slow down.  Turn off the TV.  Stop finding “things to do” or even just “things to obsess about”.  Stop stalking friends and foes on facebook.  Just stop, and hear His still small voice.

Today, she realizes that the God she serves is big enough to shout through her distractions.  Today, He did that in the form of yet another lovely lady that He had strategically placed in her life so long ago.  She read her message, like so many others….out of the blue encouragement and praise for this simple thing He’s been leading her to do….and that one liner that always gets her “Girl, you were made for this”.

Have you been this girl? Are you this girl right now?  Are you afraid to take terrifying steps before you that carry absolutely no promise of any specific outcome?  What is on the other side of the tightrope you are on?

I pray today for courage for myself and for YOU to continue taking  scary steps.  I don’t know about you, but I spend way too much time being fearful and anxious.  I fear loss and failure-and for good reason!  But to all our fears of loss, God says-what about the gain?  What about trusting in Him?  What about realizing that all of this is passing by anyway…the only things of “forever” are that which is rooted in His promises.

So what about following His leading no matter how crazy it feels, no matter how scary it seems.  What about taking that step on that tight rope and feeling the exhilaration of trusting in nothing more than the invisible force in front of you?  What if you took that step, and then took one more.  What if you stood in the middle of the tight rope, 20 stories up, even in an earthquake, yet didn’t fall?  What if?

For those of you that follow Jesus, you’ll know what I mean by the following:  You know how out of ALL the promises and prophecies of Scripture, that they’ll be that one, or two, or a few that out of all of the, seem to be the constant in our walks?  What if there is intention behind those promises that is directed at each of us as individuals because that is the very promise that God knows WE need to learn and apply more than any of his other magnificent promises.  What if those specific promises are rooted in our promised inheritance in Him.

What are God’s promises to you? What is the inheritance He desires for you to believe and accept here on Earth as we await for what is yet to come?

Here is mine: He brings it to me from Phillipians 4:6 “Darcy, rejoice in Me, always, REJOICE!  Let your gentle spirit be known to all for I am near. Be anxious for NOTHING but in everything in prayer and thanksgiving let your request be made known to Me, and My peace that transcends all understanding will guard your heart and your mind.”

I encourage you dear sisters, dear friends to listen to what YOUR call is.  Wherever you are on your journey, wherever you are at in this life: Early stage, mid stage, late stage…hell who among us even knows “what” our stage is…tomorrow could be our finale.  Take your step, make your leap. You’re not alone.  #onEarthasitisinHeaven #Godprovides #youarea....

Xoxo,
Darcy

Searching for BLISS in a terrain of sadness

'O spring in the desert, O shelter from the heat, O light in the darkness, O guide for the feet, O joy for our sadness, O support for the weak, O Lord with us always, your presence we seek.'

John the Baptist calls himself ‘A voice crying out in the wilderness’ which might be a reference to difficult geographical terrain OR could reference crying "out" to those around who weren't listening. 

Yes God.  Today I need your help with healing a great sadness in my heart.  How do I feel this, but not be consumed by it?  How do process it in a healthy way through YOU and not the people in my life?  How do I release it?  How do I actually “let it go” and trust and believe in the unseen and the unknown, in the promises you’ve made?  How do I apply YOUR truth to me, and to those who have “caused” this great sadness?   

You see for 43 years, which is a very long time!  I mean not long for you because you’re like ‘eternity’ old, but for me, it’s as long as I’ve been aware of myself. For the entirety of THAT time, the view I’ve had of myself and the role of other people in my life…the role of relationships has been….well…wrong.  It’s been unhealthy and has led to brokenness and pain.  It simply hasn’t worked.  Failed expectations.  I think that the people in my life have a responsibility to me-to be kind to me, to understand my hurts and pain, to know where and when I need support.  To heal me, to love me.  You say, “yes” your people are instructed to live in ways that are righteous with each other, but you point out repeatedly that because we are flawed and broken that it is IMPOSSIBLE for us to do any of that to perfection. That in fact, YOU God are the only one who can redeem my brokenness, my sadness, meet my needs and restore my life. Only you. Nobody else.  Not one other person on this Earth can do that job.

Lord show me how to not lose sight of that.  How do I live day by day “not” putting expectations on the people in my life that don’t rightfully belong to them and/or that are flat out incapable of doing a job they were never created to do?  Do I expect a car to be a fish?  Or a house to be a lake?  No.  Why then do I expect your creation to be my source of love and healing when they were never created to be that. 

Help me Lord with my wrong thinking.  Search my heart God and redirect the thoughts and feelings it produces to their rightful place, at your feet.  Help me find my rest in you.  Help me know how to receive your peace, your love, your provision. 

You send us out as sheep among wolves because you are the Lion running alongside us.  Help me remember that, always. Help me stay rooted in that.  You are good.  You are good.  You are good. 

I am your beloved.  I am your favorite daughter.  And you Lord, you are my Father, YOU are my King.  YOU are my redeemer, my restorer, the source and fulfillment of my love.

You look down on my broken heart and you regard it.  You mourn with me, you grieve on my behalf and you wait patiently to allow me to let you heal me.

Thank you Lord Jesus.  You are my everything. #blissedandblessed #forever